[ this catches him off guard; Obi-Wan does not recall taking Anakin down there himself. in fact, he doesn't remember going down there at all until he had to pick Anakin up from illegal racing. his heart sinks as he gets the sense he knows the answer before he asks: ]
[ Obi-Wan doesn't have a good answer to that, and he wonders what he would have said back then. That it was the politics of the thing? As Jedi they had weight and voice, but they do not have a seat in the Senate, and any justice they might make moves toward would have to handed over to the Senate unless it were strictly Jedi business. The problem is that Obi-Wan can now see in hindsight with crystal clarity, and all of it just sounds like a poor excuse. ]
[ Obi-Wan has spent a lifetime being surprised by Anakin Skywalker, but seeing these words, irrefutable in print, is enough to take the breath out of him. The shock reverberates over their bond like a plucked string. ]
Back? To Tatooine? Why in the world would you think that?
[ The emotion he feels is so complex that he cannot untangle it. Anakin thought that even after he was accepted they would abandon him. Worse, that Obi-Wan would have allowed it. Felt it so strongly that he didn't trust enough to ask a question about this new world he had been thrust in to. And Obi-Wan had never thought to question it. ]
[ his fingers hover over the keys, staring down at his words and the response. was it the wrong thing to say? he doesn't think he has ever said the words so plainly. even when Padme asked him, he hadn't been able to confirm her suspicions out loud. he has no idea if he just made things worse, but it is too late to take it back and truth be told — he doesn't really want to. ]
There is no need to apologize. Thank you for telling me.
![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
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Did you go with someone?
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I had no idea.
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But you know so many of them now.
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Why do we allow it? What excuse do we have as Jedi?
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Why didn't you?
Ask, that is.
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I didn't want to get sent back.
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Back? To Tatooine? Why in the world would you think that?
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I would never have let that happen.
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Master, even Qui-Gon didn't convince them.
Everyone knew I was always on thin ice.
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If they had not accepted you when I spoke to them after Naboo, neither of us would be Jedi today. Not as part of the Order, anyway.
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But, even if that was the case, I wouldn't have known that.
Everyone said no, and then they changed their minds. I didn't want to give them even more reason to change their minds again.
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Maul murdered my Master.
You are what saved me from falling apart completely.
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But
You didn't have a choice
You were stuck with me
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Even when you were twelve and questioning your place in the Order, I had every intention of going with you if you left.
[ a shocky pause, and then he asks because he cannot help himself: ]
Have you really believed that, this whole time?
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Of course not
I know we're friends now
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You are my dearest friend, Anakin.
[ he pauses, but only for a brief moment, before forging boldly forward: ]
I love you. I have never felt burdened by you.
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I'm sorry Master
Forget I said anything
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There is no need to apologize. Thank you for telling me.
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You don't have an answer, do you?
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