You are not the first Jedi to question, dear one. I doubt you would have been the last, either.
You have always been gifted with a different point of view, but I think that is part of what makes you such a good Jedi. You see what the rest of us cannot.
I trust you. I want to help you, if only you will let me.
You do know. You know who we should be protecting, you know what is right and what is wrong. You know that the Order has changed, even from the day you came to us.
But Anakin I cannot help you when you freeze me out.
I can't release it [It's fear inside their bond, the dull, blunt ache of it coupled with the knowledge of inevitability. Of how many Jedi they've lost. Of Obi-Wan's willingness, his belief that Anakin could endure this. And the knowledge that he can't. Won't.]
[ He can feel that fear and helplessness. Obi-Wan does nothing to keep it out, letting it wash into a melting pot of colour with his own quiet grief and guilt. ]
[ the admission feels like two hands around his heart, wringing the blood out. it is worse than it had ever been before; perhaps because he now knows the very specific dread that comes with knowing it is too late. ]
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You don't have an answer, do you?
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Why am I the only one affected like this?
Why can't I just accept it like the rest of the Council?
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You have always been gifted with a different point of view, but I think that is part of what makes you such a good Jedi. You see what the rest of us cannot.
I trust you.
I want to help you, if only you will let me.
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I've never been stopping you, it's always been the other way around.
We can't just
We can't just keep putting things off until the war is over. You tell me I'm a good Jedi, but I barely know who we are anymore.
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But Anakin
I cannot help you when you freeze me out.
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I do hope I am still speaking to Anakin and not a droid exceptionally good at mimicry.
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It feels better to have some transparency between us
To know what is on your mind.
1/2
You're right, it's been a long time
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You can't
It isn't fair to ask this of me
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And I have regretted it ever since.
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[It's fear inside their bond, the dull, blunt ache of it coupled with the knowledge of inevitability. Of how many Jedi they've lost. Of Obi-Wan's willingness, his belief that Anakin could endure this. And the knowledge that he can't. Won't.]
And I know that I should
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What is preventing you?
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Decide that I can just let you die?
I can't
Especially not when we've accepted so many losses already. Losses you know we could have prevented.
If following orders or obeying the Council mean sacrificing you one day, the way it meant betraying Ahsoka
How could I?
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[ the admission feels like two hands around his heart, wringing the blood out. it is worse than it had ever been before; perhaps because he now knows the very specific dread that comes with knowing it is too late. ]
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But if you had to
You could
You would find a way