I'm telling you this, Anakin, because my Master thought the same as you. The Council did not always agree with him, but it did not make him a bad Jedi.
[ Obi-Wan knows there is no sense in wishing for what cannot be, but he can't help but wonder if Qui-Gon would not have been a better Master than he. Would he have been able to intuit what was going on, the way he had such an uncanny ability to do? Could he have saved Anakin from the fall? ]
Do you know why you did them? It plays on repeat, not like a transmission on loop, but like the slow, spaced out ripples in the room of a thousand fountains.]
Of course I do [We're fighting a war, we've all had to do things- but that isn't right is it?
He wasn't fighting a war on Tatooine. And even in combat- he's known when he should stop-]
[ Anakin is not wrong, but this is such a dangerous train of thought. Did he think they deserved it when he descended upon the Temple? Were these the lies Palpatine had fed Anakin over so many years? Obi-Wan is not quick to hatred, but... ]
Confusing justice with revenge is one of our greatest struggles. I have felt it too.
Whatever you have done is only part of who you are. Every time the Force presents us with this choice, you have another chance to make a different one. That you continue to try is what makes you a good Jedi.
[His pulse thrums in his ears like a drum, heavy with adrenaline. Anakin can feel the heat of it inside himself as if he's waiting for a blow to land. Preparing for the next movement of a fight. He says confusing justice with revenge and Anakin wants to rush to meet it, to say that he knows the difference!
But the reply doesn't end there. It is a part of who you are, he reads, make a choice he understands. And then, That you continue to try is what makes you a good Jedi. His eyes retrace the words.
...Then they start over, at the beginning. And he realizes he'd read something wrong. is only part of who you are. His breathing slows. He closes his eyes and forces himself to swallow.]
What [It's there, the fear. The voice that says he doesn't trust you. He doesn't understand you.]
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I wish you had the opportunity to know Qui-Gon better. The two of you are cut from the same cloth.
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I'm sorry Master.
I know you wanted more time with him.
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It's different
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What makes you say that?
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Or you
I've done things I shouldn't
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Do you know why you did them?
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Do you know why you did them?
It plays on repeat, not like a transmission on loop, but like the slow, spaced out ripples in the room of a thousand fountains.]
Of course I do
[We're fighting a war, we've all had to do things-
but that isn't right is it?
He wasn't fighting a war on Tatooine. And even in combat- he's known when he should stop-]
It's
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Go on.
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Sometimes they deserve it
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Confusing justice with revenge is one of our greatest struggles. I have felt it too.
Whatever you have done is only part of who you are. Every time the Force presents us with this choice, you have another chance to make a different one. That you continue to try is what makes you a good Jedi.
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But the reply doesn't end there. It is a part of who you are, he reads, make a choice he understands. And then, That you continue to try is what makes you a good Jedi. His eyes retrace the words.
...Then they start over, at the beginning. And he realizes he'd read something wrong. is only part of who you are. His breathing slows. He closes his eyes and forces himself to swallow.]
What
[It's there, the fear. The voice that says he doesn't trust you. He doesn't understand you.]
What if I can't regret my actions?
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